short thoughts from home..

fleeting thoughts on the thirteenth morning back in my home town.

what never entered my mind until I had been home for five or so days was just how much I was relishing the lack of city traffic. I’m so relaxed I find myself going 50km/hr in a 60km/hr zone. unheard of.

there really is nothing like being looked after by your mum. home-cooked meals, offers to stock up on any groceries you like, washing done before you even realised it, surprise sweet treats.

the five minute proximity to the beach is a game changer. I think I might become a swimming person. I’ve always been a jump in the ocean kind of girl but maybe I need some goggles?

child play will always remain fun. the simple joy in drawing with my seven year old niece (Black Pink from the Ice Cream music video, it’s her favourite). perhaps not as fun for her when I’m (unsurprisingly) better in her eyes. clearly we are both the eldest girls and like attention and to be the best at things.

big roundabouts are the most satisfying to drive on. the sinuous manoeuvre of the wheel is graceful, barely requiring the use of the brakes. I love that my town has many.

it occurs to me to feel guilty for all the cupping, massage and oil treatments my mum graciously gives but my body thanks me for it. I can feel my knots loosening, my shoulders relaxing. my mother’s exclamations at the improvements in body is encouraging.

listening each morning as my dad, mum and myself begin to start moving about the house. from 5am onwards, we each creep about. leaving for work, fetching the paper, drinking hot lemon and water, escaping to walk. all early birds, week days and weekends. our own separate dances, twining around each other.

home is forever jokingly known as Windy Whyalla. strong and brutal sometimes, occasionally a pleasant breeze. I learn that in the very early morning it is often gentle, calm. watching the ripples across the otherwise still water in the marina is meditative, almost hypnotic.

I’m forever obsessed with sunsets of the bush, often driving to the edge of town to watch it go down, nothing but trees on the horizon. pinks, oranges, purples, blues. every imaginable shade. what I’ve been missing out on though, is the sun rising over the distant Southern Flinders Ranges, all the way across the gulf. mornings on the jetty are magical.

one cannot go out without seeing someone you know. or someone that knows your mum, or dad, or brother, and recognises you. from the mums of people you went to primary school to your own grandma, brother’s friends and parents colleagues. you will always see someone.

thank god there are decent coffee places now (and plural!). not just for the coffee, in reality I can live with out it, but for the routine of it. making my purchase (hot, or iced) and settling into a seat with good light, not too hot or cold, comfortable. bringing out my book and pencil because so far I’ve been leaning towards non-fiction as an accompaniment. losing myself for ten to forty minutes. will I have long enough here to achieve regular status?

I find myself sitting with silence. back when I was in my own space, even at work, I had music going almost constantly. different playlists for different moods. since I’ve been here, even at home on my own when my parents are working, I don’t rush to it. the cacophony of the local dogs sounding off, the ever present wind in the leaves, call of the birds, the clacking of the keyboard. I relish the silence.

mum buys tic toc biscuits. I don’t care how old I get, I won’t stop loving tic toc biscuits. though it occurs to me, when was the last time I turned one over to check the time?